lesbiangaara: hey kids if ur parents are abusive, dont be surprised if they suddenly change all their behaviors when u finally move out, if they start acting very nice and never even allude to all those times Before when they were treating u bad. this is a form of gaslighting and if u plan to… Continue reading
Tag: abuse
petruscuniculus: thatdiabolicalfeminist: butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway: selchieproductions: i mean, maybe this is my inner “survivor of child abuse” talking, but I am not going to tell abusive parents that they’re bad at bringing up their children without a bullet proof plan with regards to how I could protect my student from the emotional and physical backlash of that… Continue reading
jaclcfrost: jaclcfrost: idk the pushing of the Forgive Thy Abuser narrative puts a bad taste in my mouth and it’s such a not good thing to try to force everyone into then paint them as an awful person who will never heal if they don’t offer forgiveness. but. keep spitting out “forgive them!” i guess.… Continue reading
myexalted: myexalted: Listen…. the fact that Kevin Day has a complicated relationship with his abuser is so important and the fact that Neil gets disgusted because of the genetic similarities he share with his biological father/abuser is also very important to me ok
Press coverage of Amber Heard’s sexuality shows that biphobia is alive and well– and has terrible costs
“Amber Heard‘s sexuality is only relevant in that bi women are at far greater risk of experiencing intimate partner violence…”
Photos: Broadimage/REX/Shutterstock/John Salangsang/BFA/Matt Baron/David Fisher/AGF s.r.l.
Painting the narrative to both subtly and overtly shame her sexuality in a way that simultaneously erases bisexuality,
“Lesbian past”
“Bisexual tendencies”
and exploits it as a negative character flaw in order to justify JD’s actions.
The amount of misogynistic biphobia here is disgusting.
“Put their marriage on the rocks”
Yeah because she also likes women is why that marriage didn’t work out.
Nothing to do with the fact that he BEAT HER.
How to tell if you are emotionally abusive
hiccup-queen: alexaunderground: elizabethalexis: lora-mathis: annnmoody: fuckyeahwomenprotesting: I feel we talk about signs of abuse from the victims standpoint but not from the abusers standpoint. In order to stop emotional abuse and recognize when we engage in unhealthy behaviors I made this list. Do you react to important people in your life by ignoring them completely… Continue reading How to tell if you are emotionally abusive
An abusive man may embellish his childhood suffering once he discovers that it helps him escape responsibility. The National District Attorney’s Association Bulletin reported a revealing study that was conducted on another group of destructive men: child sexual abusers. The researcher asked each man whether he himself had been sexually victimized as a child. A hefty 67 percent of the subjects said yes. However, the researcher then informed the men that he was going to hook them up to a lie-detector test and ask them the same questions again. Affirmative answers suddenly dropped to only 29 percent. In other words, abusers of all varieties tend to realize the mileage they can get out of saying, ‘I’m abusive because the same thing was done to me.’
Lundy Bancroft,
Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
(via blackarachnias)
read this.
(via dopegirlfresh)
Abusive men are lying liars who lie.
(via celtyradfem)
I know I’ve told this story before, but my abusive ex refused to let me take birth control. I was on the pill until he found them in my purse.
I went to the Student Health Center—they were completely unhelpful, choosing to lecture me about the importance of safe sex (recommending condoms) instead of actually listening to my problem.
Then I went to Planned Parenthood. The Nurse Practitioner took one look at my fading bruises and stopped the exam. She called in the doctor. The doctor came in and simply asked me: “Are you ready to leave him?” When I denied that I was being abused, she didn’t argue with me. She just asked me what I needed. I said I need a birth control method that my boyfriend couldn’t detect. She recommended a few options and we decided on Depo.
When I told her that my boyfriend read my emails and listened to my phone messages and was known to follow me, she suggested to do the Depo injections at off hours when the clinic was normally closed. She made a note in my chart and instructed the front desk never to leave messages for me—instead, she programmed her personal cell phone number into my phone under the name “Nora”. She told me she would call me to schedule my appointments; she wouldn’t leave a message, but I should call her back when I was able to.
And that was it. No judgment. No lecture. She walked me to the door and told me to call her day or night if I needed anything. That she lived 5 blocks from campus and would come get me. That I wasn’t alone. That she just wanted me to be safe.
I never called her to come to my rescue. But I have no doubt that she would have come if I had called. She kept me on Depo for a year, giving me those monthly injections in secret, helping me prevent a desperately unwanted pregnancy.
I cannot thank Planned Parenthood enough for the work they do.
revolutionarygays: i am so tired of narratives that show girls w absentee/abusive fathers finally healing because they met a Good Man and Let Go Of Their Bitterness TBH i’m here for every girl who doesn’t trust any man because of what her father did to her, i’m here for every girl whose story will never… Continue reading
3 Ways to Keep Yourself Safe When You’re Not Ready to Leave Your Abusive Partner
In addition to what’s mentioned in this link, we have some info to help folks make a plan to stay safe when leaving an abusive relationship, and when they can’t leave just yet: The Scarleteen Safety Plan
Seriously, I’ve only been able to skim this article so far, but I definitely plan on reading the whole thing later
If you’re being abused by your partner, and you’re reading this right now, then you have awe-inspiring strength.
You’re suffering, but you have the courage to seek out ideas on how to take care of yourself.
I’m guessing you haven’t come across many tips like these. When I was being abused, the only advice I found was about how to leave an abusive partner, or how to heal after you’ve left.
In this society we sometimes talk about abuse victims being strong after they leave, but frame them as weak before hand. I think that is so wrong. Living in an abusive relationship takes a strength that most people cannot even comprehend. you’re not weak because you stay. there are a million reasons why we stay because, frankly, abusers actively work to keep their victims trapped.
So know that if you’re in an abusive relationship right now as you read this, I think you are strong as fuck, and I am rooting hard as hell for you.
Honestly, if people feel even a little inclined to reblog this, I would appreciate it. I am not trying to guilt anyone, if you don’t reblog I won’t think you’re a horrible person, that’s totally your prerogative… But if these words can help even just one current victim of domestic violence… I would be so happy.
So many people can’t leave. So many. Please be safe.
3 Ways to Keep Yourself Safe When You’re Not Ready to Leave Your Abusive Partner
Monsters' Queen 